Humour

A taste of some of my humour! Link to Humour Category >> 

Martha’s Magic Meatballs

In her madness, mild-mannered Martha mistakenly mixed mustard into the miniature meatballs made for the meal at the Mad March meeting of Manchester Masons. Meanwhile, making sure the musical melodies were meaningful, Master of Ceremonies, Micky Mercury, masticated merrily on the marvelous morsels. “Mmmmmm. These meatballs are moorish”, he mumbled, mopping his mucky mustache, and mentioned that maybe Martha might make more to merchant at the Mayor’s Meat Market on Monday morning.

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Colour blindness

You know what it’s like in the morning when it’s dark and you’re rushing to get ready for work – everything conspires against you to make you late, and dark colours all look the same. I once got into my car with shoes of different colours, one navy, one black. Why do I always have to buy two pairs of shoes in different colours when I find some I like? Another time, I had two identical suits, one black watch, one plum watch. The same thing happened. I was in my car when I realised I was wearing the jacket of one suit and the skirt of the other. Fortunately, as it was light by then I spotted both mistakes before I drove off to work, and went back in to change. I must point out at this time I was not yet senile, and was holding down a very responsible job! 

However, now I am senile and have been put out to grass and ignored by any company who can’t deal with people over the age of sixty, I have discovered that the same thing has happened again. Only this time, I didn’t discover it before I went to work. In fact, I didn’t discover it while I was at work either, nor when I arrived home and changed! 

Picture the scene. I’m on my first day on a temporary assignment, trying to look cool. 
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